Lizzy McAlpine’s “Older” illuminates the shared struggle of finding solace in leaving our youth behind, shedding light on our fears and dreams in a ballad on the realities of life.
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Stream: “Older” – Lizzy McAlpine
In the wake of teenage death and the forthcoming birth of adulthood, we tend to find ourselves falling back upon the same rooted ideals: who am I if not a reflection of what society wants me to become and where do I stand if I fail to achieve the standard? There is a perplexity to growth at its core, something tangible yet definitive when observed.
Singer/songwriter Lizzy McAlpine understands the notion, appreciating age for what it is but also recognizing the role time can play on the mind– an awakening per se that affects all but is recognized by few. Released in early February, “Older” is a standout on her third studio album (also titled Older), approaching the subtleties of life and paying homage to the past as she reflects on the maybes of the future.
Over and over
A carousel ride
Pay for your ticket
Watch the red moon climb
Sick to my stomach
Can’t find the ground
Stuck in a loop
Watch the curtain come down
She begins with a memory, nothing too distinct but one so universal it plays in every listener’s mind like a beckoning of past time. As the carousel wanes and waxes into the night sky, so does this nostalgia. You are both transported into McAlpine’s mind, allowed to see her wistful longing for what once was and brought into your own calling of sentiment as you reconcile with what may be. It is an unraveling of our innermost fears and dreams, brought to the forefront to be examined, appreciated, and let go all in 3 minutes and 21 seconds.
Thought it’d be over by now
Thought you would leave
Thought I would come to my senses
Wish I was stronger somehow
Wish it was easy
Somewhere I lost all my senses
I wish I knew what the end is
For McAlpine, this piano ballad served as the opening of a new era. As she transitions from her youth into the long-forsaken adulthood she describes as difficult to welcome, she brings to light how emotions embedded within memories can be arduous to grapple with on this journey. She embraces loss and love and questions the fine line between the two that creates this unease in the steady spiral of life. Memories become poignant and inescapable as she grieves her youth; however, it’s a nod to lost time that isn’t that lost.
Over and over, watch it all pass
Mom’s gettin’ older, I’m wanting it back
Where no one is dying,
and no one is hurt
And I have been good to you
instead of making it worse
In an interview with Variety’s Steven J. Horowitz, McAlpine notes her inability to grasp the concept of time – finding a deeply visceral connection to her lack of control over it and regret that she finds hard to reconcile with.
“Older” tells the story of this regret, anchoring her to her emotions whilst ushering a maturity that she questions at the song’s start and accepts by its end. She is no longer tethered to those same poignant memories and allows her youth to flee so that this sense of mandatory adulthood can be left in its wake. As the chorus repeats itself in a final strain, and as the stated curtain begins to descend, so begins a new chapter in the book of her life that she’s long put to the side– an awakening for all who partake in the story.
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Older
an album by Lizzy McAlpine
