Up-and-coming Indonesian artist Stephanie Poetri dwells in the longing of long distance on her new single “Picture Myself,” an intimate upheaval of raw heartache and tender acoustic balladry.
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Stream: “Picture Myself” – Stephanie Poetri
Does longing really make the heart grow fonder? Perhaps extended time and space work well with some relationships; for the rest of us, it’s a crutch, a point of pain, and an ever-present emotional burden that we just can’t shake. When time spent together with our loved one is instead spent wallowing in a place of yearning and doubt, angst and loneliness, we begin to second-guess ourselves and our relationship – as Indonesian singer/songwriter Stephanie Poetri so poignantly expresses in her latest single. An intimate upheaval, “Picture Myself” is a tender lush acoustic outpouring of heartache that dwells in the longing of long distance. Many relationships are able to withstand extended physical absence, but sometimes we find it’s easier to part ways than live with a perpetual absence.
My heart is sinking
Heart in my throat
Drowning in your old leather coat
And now I spend my weekends alone
And think of all that I did now that I don’t
You moved out the West
And I moved to the city,
Made separate beds
But I still hold you in my chest
When things aren’t looking pretty
Wishing you the best
Released January 13, 2022 via Infinite Thrills and 88rising Records, “Picture Myself” marks an emotional and emphatic return for Stephanie Poetri at the very top of 2022. Following a slew of exhilarating singles in 2019 and 2020 (including her standout streaming smash “I Love You 3000“), the Indonesian singer/songwriter delivered her first EP AM:PM in early 2021, followed by an all-acoustic version of those songs later in the year. With millions of streams on Spotify and other services, it’s seems as if Poetri has had little trouble cutting through the noise – thanks as much to her glistening, evocative vocal talents, as to her equally evocative and captivating lyricism – much of which captures relatable encounters with love, growing up and finding yourself, and other parts of the modern coming-of-age experience.
What makes a heartbreaking song even better? When you can’t get it out of your head.
A collaboration with producer M-Phazes (Madonna, Demi Lovato, Kehlani) and writer Sarah Aarons (Zedd, Flume, Jessie Ware), “Picture Myself” is a special return that finds Poetri once again up against the throes of young adulthood – this time confronting her personal experience with a long distance relationship. In it, she finds herself unsure if the heartache is worth her while – and then wrestling with her feelings, because that core foundation of love still exists.
“You moved out the west and I moved to the city, made separate beds,” she sings in a bittersweet chorus. “But I still hold you in my chest when things aren’t looking pretty, wishing you the best.”
“’Picture Myself’ is an acoustic rendition of what long distance feels like and the constant wondering of whether it’s worth it or not,” Poetri explains. “As someone who’s experienced a long distance relationship, it feels like this song really captures the cycle of worrying and missing and confusion.”
Poetri’s second verse finds her diving even deeper into this anguished cycle:
But am I kidding
Myself it’s after midnight
Kicking myself for staying
Could I picture myself believing
Picture myself believing
Am I holding the words my head wants to hide
Thinking the worst forever
Could I picture myself believing
Picture myself believing in us
My head says one thing but this feels amazing
Forever is something but together were crazy
You moved out the west and I moved to the city
Made separate beds
But I still hold you in my chest when things aren’t looking pretty
Wishing you the best
Atop all the emotional distress and turmoil, “Picture Myself” also comes with its own captivating Eileen Yoon-directed music video. Shot in various parts of New York City (including the Lower East Side’s East Broadway subway station and Brooklyn’s Pizza Crew pizzeria), the music video dutifully finds Poetri “in the city” on her own. Spending her time capturing various scenic moments of urban beauty – and tearing a whole pizza pie apart with her bare hands – Poetry brings additional layers of humanity to an already deeply engaging and accessible piece of music. Whether she’s alone in a crowded space or daydreaming on the front hood of a flower-filled yellow car (the imagery really does wonders), Poetri channels her heartache into palpable emotion that we can soak up time and again.
“Picture Myself” marks the start of a new chapter for Stephanie Poetri, and while we’ll surely be playing this song on repeat, we can’t wait to hear where (and see what!) she does next.
Am I kidding myself it’s after midnight
Kicking myself to stay in could I
Picture myself believing
Picture myself believing
Am I holding the words my head wants to hide
thinking the worst forever could I
Picture Myself believing
Picture myself believing in us
I don’t know why
No, I don’t know why
I’m this way
Staying all night
But what if I leave today
And I don’t know why
Why I’m afraid to stay
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Stream: “Picture Myself” – Stephanie Poetri
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