Breaking the Record with Roan Yellowthorn, Part 36: You’re Never There

Breaking The Record 2020
Breaking The Record 2020
Jackie McLean of the indie band Roan Yellowthorn grants us an inside look at the making of an album from start to finish in her ‘Breaking The Record’ column.

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:: stream/purchase Rediscovered here ::
‘Rediscovered’ – Roan Yellowthorn

One thing Im learning – youre never there. What I mean is that, while its going on, this life, and this artistic journey, is really never over.

At every step of my musical journey, Ive had this little idea in the back of my head that at the next step Id be there.Where is there?I dont know. It doesnt exist. Thats the thing – no matter how far you go, youre never there.

Even once you reach a milestone youve always wanted to reach, a new set of milestones stack up in front of you almost immediately.

This used to bother me. It doesnt anymore.

Im grateful for the journey.

Just jumping into the Breaking The Record series documenting the making of our album from start to finish? Read part 1 here!

Something in my internal landscape has shifted over the past year or so. Im not trying to get thereanymore. Im not trying to getanywhere. Im just trying to move forward, in the direction that feels most right to me. The moving forward part is an important part of the journey. Without moving forward, the journey is over. Thats what getting theremeans. It means ending the journey. And I dont want it to end. I want to keep going on it.

Putting out an album is always a big step. But, if youre lucky, it isnt a final step.

In the past when Ive released an album Ive thought to myself that maybe it would be a vehicle to there– that maybe, suddenly, Id receive all of the validation Id ever wanted and maybe, suddenly, Id have a place in the cosmos and Id know where I was and Id be comfortable and happy in that place.

Roan Yellowthorn

Thats some kind of fantasy that doesnt exist. Its the fantasy of an unhappy person whos dissatisfied with themselves and is looking for a cure.

Maybe its a good sign that I dont feel that way so much anymore.

I know now that releasing an album is just one step of the journey. Its not a means to an end. Its a means in and of itself. Its a memento – a crystalized reminder of a moment in time. Its a relic of a time thats passed. Its a memory book. Its a photo album. Its a diary. Its a snapshot.

For my new album, to be released sometime next year, I have another wish – I dont want it to bring me there.Instead, I want it to put me on my way. I want it to propel me to the next step. So that I can keep moving forward through this journey that Im on and that I love so very much.

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:: stream/purchase my new cover album here: Rediscovered ::

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Rediscovered - Roan Yellowthorn

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:: Breaking the Record ::

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